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A letter:

Posted on December 5, 2012 by nochaosnoorder_lkd0dk Posted in heart, relationship .

I’ve heard a rumor from some elves about a letter my cousins will be receiving :

Dearest W and P,
As I was making 50 gallons of hot cocoa for the elves’ afternoon snack, my husband, Santa, rushed in the kitchen. “Merry! W and P are moving! Please make sure they aren’t missed!” He was in such a hurry to finish the toys in time for his trip, he used his finger-to-his-nose-with-a-wink-and-a-nod trick to disappear and go back to the workshop! I wish he wouldn’t do that in my kitchen. It gets sparkles in my flour.

Well, I asked one of my kitchen helpers to finish the cocoa while I went to my office. You see, there are so many children in the world, Santa and most of the elves work 363 days a year (two days off for our summer retreat in Hawaii) building and wrapping toys, preparing the sleigh, and keeping the reindeer fit, that I have been keeping track of the paperwork and other chores for the last 30 years. I still prefer to bake cookies and tend to Santa’s suit, but someone needs to coordinate things, like making sure over 1500 hundred elves pack swim suits and flip flops, or that enough sun screen has been packed (winter elves sunburn SO easily!).

Hearing the news of your move, I called to my best friend and assistant, Holly, as I swept into the office: “We have an address change!” We made sure your presents were packed in the ‘Oregon’ part of Santa’s bag, removed your Washington address from Santa’s itinerary, and made sure your Grandma and Pa’s address was marked on Santa’s map with a star.

Now, I don’t normally write to all the children who move close to Christmas – there are a lot of them! But, when Santa tells me himself (usually we hear from the Post Master General) I know this is a very special case!

So, please don’t worry, Santa knows where you are. Please be kind to each other, do your chores, and leave some cookies for Santa and carrots for the reindeer. I worry they’ll waste away from hunger on this trip!

Merry Christmas, dears!
Love,
Mrs. Merry Claus

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